Each grief experience is different

How we grieved for past losses is not a predictor of how we will grieve in the future.

We lost Drew on Christmas Eve, 2017. And then, exactly eight months later, on August 24th, I lost my mother. My grief experience with my mother was totally different than that with my son.

He died when he was only 23. My mother had a long, wonderful life. She was 96 years old. Uh. And, and I was able to be with her when she passed. So, while I mourned her passing and, and I, I miss her everyday. Um. It just wasn’t, um, it wasn’t the knife to the gut like Drew's death was. Your child is a part of you, and it’s just, it felt like a part of me died.

Um. What I found is that, when I, when I, when I tried to grieve for my mother, uh, I would be overcome with grief for Drew. So, it may sound weird, but it made it hard to grieve for my mother, because I was, and I am still grieving for Drew. And, you know, people say, “Oh. Well they’re together now. Isn’t that great?” And, well, yeah, but. (laughs) Doesn’t change the fact that he’s gone.